Monday, July 13, 2009

29 years ago

Today is July 13th and Tetsu and I are celebrating our 29th anniversary.

Tetsu and I decided to become engaged sometime in February, 29 years ago, and we simply announced our intent to marry to friends and family. We'd dated about two years and my Japanese had improved (but not enough in most people's opinions!) We were without money or possessions which didn't deter us a bit but we had to schedule our wedding day for AFTER Tetsu's summer bonus.

Tetsu and I weren't able to buy an engagement ring but we visited a small jewelry shop and bought a simple gold and glass cross pendant with a tiny almost invisible chip of a diamond in it. My engagement necklace, and Tetsu presented it to me at a formal engagement ceremony at our church a few months before our wedding day.

Some people didn't think this was really a proper engagement gift. One set of older friends wanted us to have a traditional betrothal ceremony complete with gifts of dried cuttlefish, and seaweed and fans and kimono material. The Japanese names depict fortune, long life and many children etc. and usually money will be included with the gifts in a commitment ceremony between the two families. Obviously no one in my American family would know what to do with cuttlefish and seaweed so we zilched the traditional ceremony idea fairly easily.

When my mother came to our wedding in July, she presented Tetsu with a ring to give me that was her mother's engagement ring. My grandmother wore it rarely if ever (many Japanese women only wear their rings when they are going to a special event) and it had languished in a box for over 60 years. I've worn my grandmother's ring faithfully for 29 years and jewelers have told me that though it isn't very valuable it is an interesting simple cut of diamond that isn't done these days.

Well, all things considered (language differences, culture differences, background differences) Tetsu and I have done pretty well the past 29 years. Congratulations to us!

38 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your years together! I've been reading your blog from Oklahoma for quite a long time now and really enjoy it. Blessings to you and your family!

Anonymous said...

very pretty wedding picture!

G'G'ma said...

Congratulations! Isn't it amazing how LOVE takes care of any barriers like language, culture etc? Good you got back home to celebrate with Tetsu. Best wishes and may you celebrate at least 29 more times!!!

Janet C said...

Happy Anniversary! May the Lord bless both of you with many, many more years of wedded bliss.

Valerie said...

Happy Anniversary! Such a sweet love story!

Marilyn R said...

Congrats on 29 years! Happy Anniversary! May God pour His blessings upon for many more years!

Allie said...

Happy Anniversary!!! Love your wedding photo- so sweet - and the story behind it!

Quiltin' LibraryLady said...

Congratulations to both of you.

Verónica Donoso said...

Muchas Felicitaciones !!
Congratulations ! Have a good day ! Hugs from Chile , Vero

Lindah said...

Congratulations, Tanya and Tetsu!
Good job!

Mary said...

Happy Anniversary!

I'm often amazed at how much people spend on rings and weddings -- simpler is better at least in my opinion...both your ring and pendant are lovely.

Mimi said...

Happy Anniversary!

You have such a wonderful way of telling your life stories. Thank you for sharing.

May you and Tetsu have many, many more wonderful years.

Blessings and hugs

Callie said...

Indeed! Congratulations to you both! I love your ring and cross.

Amanda said...

Many congratulations. We've just passed our thirtieth weeding anniversary, and know that it sometimes takes a lot of hard work to make a marriage work for this long. We couldn't afford a proper engagement ring either, so Christopher bought me a pretty ring with a very cheap blue stone in it = and then had the stone changed for a sapphire on our twenty-fifth anniversary, so it still looks the same.

martine said...

Happy anniversary and many wonderful years together.

anne bebbington said...

Happy Anniversary to both of you - two lovely pieces of jewellery with so much value to you both :o)

GG said...

Dear Tanya,

I just want to say your stories always seems to bring tears to my eyes or melts my heart (in good ways).

Congratulations to you and Tetsu.

Nancy said...

Congratulations to you both! And what a lovely wedding photo!

Sandy said...

Congratulations on your anniversary. I enjoy your stories and commentary on life and culture. My husband and I quietly had our 35th anniversary.
Have a wonderful day.

Sandy said...

Congratulations on your anniversary. I enjoy your stories and commentary on life and culture. My husband and I quietly had our 35th anniversary.
Have a wonderful day.

Shasta said...

Happy Anniversary Tanya and Tetsu, and congratulations for sticking with it so long. May you have many more happy years together.

The Calico Quilter said...

Congratulations indeed! It requires a lot of give and take to stay with the same person for that many years. It shows a real commitment to the "for better or worse" vow. I've been married over 32 years, and I know it is joyful work, but work nonetheless, to keep a marriage going nowadays.

The Calico Quilter said...

Oh, yes - we didn't have a traditional engagement ring either. My husband bought me a silver ring with a turquoise stone, because that's all we could afford. We were starving college students at the time!

sewprimitive karen said...

Happy Anniversary, Tanya!

Anonymous said...

いやぁ~たにさん、哲さん結婚記念日の日がまたとやってきましたね!
本当にお二人はベストマッチでいつみても素敵ですよん♪
あたしからするととってもロマンチックで可愛らしいエンゲージメントギフトだと思う!
これからもお幸せにね!
哲さんはたにさんを、たにさんは哲さんをいつまでもサポート、愛していくんだょ~!

娘より

Timi said...

Congratulations!
You look beautiful on your wedding photo!

theroyalblog said...

Happy Anniversary!!

Maya Madhavan said...

Congratulations and Happy Anniversary!

Hedgehog said...

Congratulations! May you have 29 more years together!

Diana said...

You have been so blessed and it's wonderful 29 years. I love your blog

AnnieO said...

That's a great story and it seems your 29 years together have never been dull! Congratulations and happy anniversary. My DH and I will hit 25 next February.

Patty Nordahl said...

.
Congratulations many more years together and continued blessings.

Your blog continues to inspire and I admire your ability to tell your story in such simple and heartfelt ways.

Joyce said...

Congratulations on your wedding anniversary. The cross and the ring are both beautiful. How wonderful that they were both gifts from whom you love very much--your husband and your mother.

May God continue to bless you.

Love your blog and learning about living in a different culture.

Joyce in the beautiful
Ozark Mountains in Arkansas, USA
where it's hot and muggy and we expect more thunderstorms the rest of the week.

Christine Thresh said...

What a beautiful bride and a handsome, young groom.

quiltmom said...

Tanya,
Happy Anniversary to both of you- 1980 is a special year for my spouse and I will be married 29 years at Christmas time. I love the story of your ring and think it is beautiful.
What could be nicer than wearing something that belonged to the past that became an integral part of your daily life.
Wishing you and your beloved many more happy years together.
Warmest regards,
Anna

Quilter Kathy said...

Congratulations! That is a milestone to be proud of! You sure were a beautiful bride!

Anonymous said...

A friend told me of your page and I check it now and then. I am in northern CA and enjoy your stories of quilting and cats. We were married on July 13, 1963, so joined you in celebrating our anniversary too. We have been married 46 years. I have been quilting since '96. Thank you for your blogs.
DJ

Jenny Bear said...

You were married on my 30th birthday!!!!!!!!!! Congratulations. I love your engagement necklet. Your wedding photograph is wonderful.

Jenny