Thursday, July 16, 2009

Pierced ears


Yesterday a few friends and I got together and we were talking about pierced ears. Actually we were trying to convince one friend to get her ears pierced but she is afraid to do it.

I got my ears pierced when I went away to college. My mother wouldn't let me do it when I was in high school and so the first month I was away in a dormitory I went and got my ears pierced. I've been happy ever since and really the only jewelry that I like to change and shop for are earrings. It is interesting to me that what seems like fun earrings in the States I will wear in Japan and feel very out of place. Too big and heavy or showy or something. When I'm in Japan I tend to wear conservative posts or delicate drop earrings.

It is only in the past 10 years or so that pierced ears have become popular in Japan. For years it was almost impossible for me to buy pierced earrings and the only earrings available were clip ons. Tetsu has never liked pierced ears and he has said that if I hadn't had my ears pierced long before I met him he wouldn't have allowed it. (As if I am going to let him tell me what he ALLOWS or not!)

When Leiya got to be jr. high school age she started talking about getting her ears pierced. More and more girls were doing it but there was still a stigma associated with the fashion. Only "bad" girls got their ears pierced and a girl would be excluded from school activities if it was discovered she'd had them done. I had even heard of private high schools that wouldn't accept applications if they found out that the girl had pierced ears. Whether we agreed with school policies or not, it seemed foolish to limit the high school choices so until Leiya made the decision to go to an American high school, NO PIERCED EARS!

Even Tetsu agreed to let Leiya get her ears piered when she got to the States, but NOTHING ELSE! No multiple piercings. No tattoos! And I gave her a good lecture on "getting an inch and wanting a mile". The summer that I took Leiya to the States to start her American high school life, we stepped off the airplane, came back to my mother's house and weren't there more than an hour than we were off to the mall to get Leiya's ears pierced. I even taped it on video! Good. Now Leiya feels like an all-American high school student.

Back in Japan a month or so later, I get an e-mail from Leiya and she mentioned that she'd gotten her ears pierced again!!! What was my lecture about multiple piercings? You'd better believe that I sent an un-happy e-mail back to her but there wasn't much I could do about it since the deed was done and I was back in Japan. And I guess I had done the same sort of thing once I'd gotten out from under my mother's watchful eyes some 35 years earlier.

This summer Leiya and I had a good time together but we did have an argument when I discovered she'd pierced her ear AGAIN! So now she has 5 holes in her ears! I suppose there could be worse places she might want to pierce but still I'm not happy and I had to break the news to Tetsu with utmost care... Leiya may have sealed her fate with spending the rest of her life in the States because Tetsu doesn't think she will be seriously considered for any job in Japan if she adorns herself further.

Still, I did buy Leiya some earrings for her upcoming birthday. But I only bought two.

13 comments:

Hedgehog said...

My mom freaked out when I put a third hole in my ear. I was away at school and it was the first thing she said when I came through security at the airport for a visit. :) I think we've both recovered now - and thankfully it hasn't hurt my job prospects.

Nancy said...

Loved this story, Tanya!

Anonymous said...

It's my son who has 2 diamond studs in his ears.......he did it himself in my house without my permission. What's a mom to do?

My girls, on the other hand, went through a lot to get permission---but then as fate would have it, they got infected and still no holes! I think at least one of them has an allergy to something....

BTW--the girls are 11 an 12 and the son is 17!

Connie W said...

I remember using the self-piercing earrings when I was 19. When I was in high school hardly anyone had piereced ears and they seemed like an oddity on a student. Shortly after I finished school they started become more commonplace and popular. I still have only one in each ear and will keep it that way. And no tattoos or other body piercings for me. Guess I'm an old-fashioned gal.

paula, the quilter said...

I had a dr pierce my first set of holes -- but he pierce right through a mole on one ear. No posts in that set of holes because of that. So I got another set of holes pierced. The 5th hole came about because a GF and I each wanted this one pair of earrings. So we each got one hole and then split the price of the earrings. I wear hoops in graduating sizes -- a lot. It looks like one pair of very intricate earrings when I wear them in the right holes. *grin*

andsewitis Holly said...

It's definitely a cultural thing. Indonesians pierce their babies ears almost immediately after birth so when my parents let me get mine pierced at age 7 the people asked "what took you so long?" but the other missionaries on the mission field were horrified. They thought we were backslidden but soon after that their girls wanted and were granted pierced ears so I guess I started something. I have three sets of holes but for the last 15 years or so only use the original set. An older, more mature Holly kinda regrets the other two sets. They are with me forever because they won't close up.

Stay cool, Tanya! I remember those hot, muggy summer days.

Linda said...

Giggle, being a child of the 60's, I also have three holes in each ear, at the wonderful age of 59! I don't think anybody even notices, even though I wear multiple earrings! This is in staid Canada--but not as staid as Japan I guess! Lurking Linda

scottishlass said...

I was four when I got my first set of pierced ears ... my mom thought it was cute and I hated it.
By the time I was fourteen I had five piercings in my ears and when I was 17 I pierced my nose as well by mydrlf as piercings (anywhere but the ears) were not known back then. Wore a nose ring till I was in my mid thirties at that time ALL seem to get their noses pierced LOL.

BrendaLou said...

My father always said "only scarlet women" had pierced ears...for my 18th bd my MOM took me to get them pierced! She did her own a few years later. I raised girls and all had 4 or 5 holes...they only wear 2 now and it's just diamond studs that stay in all the time.!

Allie said...

How interesting, how different cultures see things. I'm sorry I ever got mine pierced, as I'm now allergic to all earrings, but honestly? Better the ears than anything else. Egads.

Amanda said...

I had my ears pierced by my doctor when i was about 22 - I thought it would be safer than going to a shop, but both ears got infected. These days I seem to just wear the same pair of 'sleepers' the whole time, I never remember to change them. I don't have daughters but went through the whole ear ring and tattoo business with my sons, both of whom got their ears pierced, and one of them got his eyebrow pierced too. They each have one tattoo, which I don't like, and I just keep hoping that that's enough rebellion for them.

Marilyn R said...

I got my ears pierced while I was in college too. I grew up with my Father saying, "If God wanted you to have holes in your ears He would have put them there." I have just one hole in each ear, and right now I don't plan on adding more. Two is enough for me.

Judy H. said...

I'm commenting late, but I wanted to tell you that my mother also said I couldn't get my ears pierced while I was living at home -- and my generation practically all girls and several guys had pierced ears by high school. This was almost 20 years ago, and I think my dad has finally accepted that my ears are pierced now.