Wednesday, July 08, 2009

Summer's end

Off and away I go to Japan today. And Leiya went back to Ohio yesterday.

This was sort of a different summer starting with the sudden decision to come to the States early and then the uncertainties about where the hospital stays were going to lead. I didn't see as many people as I usually do. I didn't do as much shopping... well, minus Jo Ann's. That store made a profit off of me this year.

I have a sense of accomplishment from all the cleaning I did, which by the way, may lead to problems for Marcy later. Yesterday Mother leaning on her walker, stood in front of her very neat and polished desk and said

"Something's different about this desk... I thought there were other things here..."

Yeah! About three inches thickness of papers and dust and THINGS are missing now! So I admitted to cleaning it off (along with the cupboards and drawers and closet and cabinets and bookshelves and bedside tables and under the bed and over the refrigerator, etc. etc.! But she hasn't noticed any of that yet...) And I directed her to where some of her favorite things had been repositioned... But she probably won't remember.

It is sort of sad... The way my mother does remember when she remembers has changed which is all the more confusing. Yet I know my cleaning has made things safer for her, cheerier for her, and in the long run easier for Marcy and family and even for me. And it was a job that only I could do. The sorting of important. The deciding what holds history for our family and what were trinkets from the 5 and 10...

Over the month I could see my mother's health improve! That was a great blessing! This past week she ventures out of her bed more and forages into the refrigerator looking for things to nibble. For awhile we were insisting she get out of bed for 10 minutes every day and she balked at that. For awhile I assisted her on every bathroom trip. For awhile she would eat only a tablespoon at a time. These days she wanders around her rooms and we have to remind her to use the walker.

But I know my mother with go into a slump again in a day or two. She almost always does when I return to Japan. Marcy reports that even when she is in the best of health Mother will retire to her bedroom and be lethargic and unresponsive to the people around her for a week. And then she'll forget that I just was there and start asking when I'm coming again.

But I have a husband in Japan looking forward to coming home at nights to a lighted house, some cooking and a bit of company expressed in terms other than meows and woofs. And my furry family will be very happy to have my attentions again. And I need to get back to work to help support my kids' education. Marcy and Keion will have to make the decisions from here about what is best for THEIR family and for Grandma. I hoped my being here helped out people a little bit...

Okay. My bags are packed to overflowing! (Why? I didn't do THAT much shopping!) and for the next few hours I'm going to be struggling with them like I do on every return to Japan. The same shuffling of stuff from one suitcase to another in an attempt to make everything lighter! Why won't I ever learn!!!

Next stop. Japan!

11 comments:

Michele's Quilting Journey said...

Sending prayers for a safe journey. Know that as someone whose mom is in a moderately advanced stage of Alzheimer's, that every sign you see in your mother are ones that I know very, very well in my own mother. I have spent 3 years cleaning their home to a safe level for negotiating (my mom is also legally blind) and my month long stays do so much to help bring her back out of the fog of isolation that I came and went for 5 whole months last year. Each time, the house is a bit cleaner, the fog a bit disapated, and my joy at having made a difference...even for a bit...greater. It is the hardest spiritual and emotional and physical journey of my life helping them. But one I do at a moment's notice...as you did...over and over...with an exhausted but happy heart.

CT said...

Take care, and thank you for sharing a bit more of your life. :D Have a safe journey,

May God bless you and keep you safe

BrendaLou said...

Thinking of you and knowing how hard it is to leave and what a joy is awaiting you on being home. A very big hug and many prayers your way.

Mrs. Goodneedle said...

Safe travels and best wishes for happy landing back at home. You have expressed, so eloquently, what many of us are dealing with and can relate to; thank you.

Shasta said...

I hope your travels are uneventful. I am sure that your efforts were very much appreciated by your family, and they will feel your presence for a long time.

Allie said...

Safe travel, dear Tanya. I'm sure it was very hard to leave, and I'm equally sure Tetsu and your furry family will be ecstatic to see you.

Diane said...

Oh Tanya, what you did for your family is invaluable. The smile on your mother's face in that last picture says it all!

Elaine Adair said...

It's good to know she can still be happy about things, but sad it cannot be permanent.

Have you ever thought about a pet for her? A cat of quiet dog?

Timi said...

I think you've done a great job, Tanya, and helped a lot your family!
Take care!

roberta said...

have a safe trip Tanya! I'll be in prayer for your whole family at this time. It is good you go back feeling a sense of accomplishment for the things you did for your mom, yes you were the one that had to do the sorting even if it took some hard decision making.
And as you go back to where you really belong, trust in the Lord with all your heart for your mom's next chapter of life, He will take care of her.
Love from Italy

meggie said...

Tetsu & your fur babies will be so glad to have you home!!