Saturday, December 16, 2006

Grief and Customs

No quilting or sewing or anything though I think I had wanted to make some more coasters tonight. That may not happen. Last night Yano-san called to say her mother had died so I went over to pay my condolences. Mrs. Yano has had her mother at home for the past two months and was "force" feeding her just to keep her alive. Obaachan hasn't really been in this world for a year now. Things were going along well and the whole reason Obaachan came home was so she could die surrounded by her family. Still... Kyoko-san was very upset and wishing she could have done more. Obaachan was laid out on the floor in the room where she had had her hospital bed and there was an altar behind her and a smaller altar for burning insense. The family was having some argument about how there should be a mountain of rice dumplings on the altar instead of the measly 6 that the funeral people brought. They determined it didn't really matter. They also didn't like the plywood altar the funeral people had brought but what can they do about it now. Another argument about the flower rings will be displayed and whose name should be printed. All these things that I don't understand even though I've lived here 30 years.

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